And.....


To the ladies from the men


> >> >> Learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up, put it
> >> >> down. We need it up, you need it down. You
> >> >> don't hear us bitching about you leaving it down.
> >> >>
> >> >> ALL men see in only 16 colors. Peach is a
> >> >> fruit, not a color.
> >> >>
> >> >> If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret
> >> >> girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
> >> >>
> >> >> If you think you're fat, you probably are.
> >> >> Don't ask us. We refuse to answer.
> >> >>
> >> >> Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always
> >> >> more attractive than short hair.
> >> >>
> >> >> One of the big reasons guys fear getting
> >> >> married is that married women always cut their hair, and
> >> >> by then you're stuck with her.
> >> >>
> >> >> Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are
> >> >> not quests to see if we can find the perfect
> >> >> present yet again!
> >> >>
> >> >> If you ask a question you don't want an answer
> >> >> to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
> >> >>
> >> >> Sometimes, we're not thinking about you. Live with it.
> >> >>
> >> >> Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless
> >> >> you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint,
> >> >> the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.
> >> >>
> >> >> Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the
> >> >> changing of the tides. Let it be.
> >> >>
> >> >> Shopping is not a sport, and no, we're never
> >> >> going to think of it that way.
> >> >>
> >> >> When we have to go somewhere, absolutely
> >> >> anything you wear is fine. Really.
> >> >>
> >> >> You have enough clothes. You have too many shoes.
> >> >>
> >> >> Crying is blackmail.
> >> >>
> >> >> Ask for what you want. Let's be clear on this
> >> >> one:
> >> >>
> >> >> Subtle hints don't work.
> >> >> Strong hints don't work.
> >> >> Really obvious hints don't work.
> >> >> Just say it!
> >> >>
> >> >> No, we don't know what day it is. We never
> >> >> will. Mark anniversaries on the calendar.
> >> >>
> >> >> Peeing standing up is more difficult. We're
> >> >> bound to miss sometimes.
> >> >>
> >> >> Most guys own three pairs of shoes. What makes
> >> >> you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair,
> >> >> out of thirty, would look good with your dress?
> >> >>
> >> >> Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to
> >> >> almost every question.
> >> >>
> >> >> Come to us with a problem only if you want help
> >> >> solving it. That's what we do.
> >> >>
> >> >> Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
> >> >>
> >> >> A headache that lasts for 17 months is a
> >> >> problem. See a doctor.
> >> >>
> >> >> Foreign films are best left to foreigners.
> >> >> (Unless it's Bruce Lee or some war flick where it
> >> >> doesn't really matter what the #### they're saying
> >> >> anyway.
> >> >>
> >> >> Check your oil.
> >> >>
> >> >> It is neither in your best interest nor ours to
> >> >> take the quiz together. No, it doesn't matter which
> >> >> quiz.
> >> >>
> >> >> Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible
> >> >> in an argument.
> >> >>
> >> >> All comments become null and void after 7 days.
> >> >>
> >> >> If something we said can be interpreted two
> >> >> ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we
> >> >> meant the other one.
> >> >>
> >> >> Let us ogle. We're going to look anyway; it's genetic.
> >> >>
> >> >> You can either tell us to do something OR tell
> >> >> us how to do something, but not both.
> >> >>
> >> >> Whenever possible, please say whatever you have
> >> >> to say during commercials.
> >> >>
> >> >> If it itches, it will be scratched.
> >> >>
> >> >> Beer is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.
> >> >>
> >> >> If we ask what's wrong and you say "nothing",
> >> >> we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you're
> >> >> lying, but it's just not worth the hassle.
> >> >>
> >> >> Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have
> >> >> to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know we
> >> >> really don't mind that, it's like camping!
_________________________
My New site OpenEyes