Hi Crackle, I'm the grouch here.
I program C, PHP, Perl, and most anything else that comes to my attention.
I run a site at http://www.scallion.sp00fed.net,
let me know if there's anything you want to see on it that you don't.
Use google before you post here, else you'll feel my grouchieness, which you aren't feeling now, obviously.