Moffesto, I don't think anyone here is going to be willing to direct you on the path of 'lamer.' I'm not trying to be an [censored], but that's not what we're about here at UGN
You could however, try to take this opportunity to learn a thing or 2 about web programming on your own. I reccommend
www.programmingtutorials.com or Le4rner's site - I forgot what it's called. And of course Google is always your friend.