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#24471 - 08/02/02 03:53 AM to much time on the pc
Moffesto Offline
UGN Supporter

Registered: 04/22/02
Posts: 730
Loc: Kuntucky
Hmmm, in the last few days being able to get out meeting people and talking to them online and shit. I have noticed in person i cant quite say what i can online... online i have confedence and dont really care what ppl think of what i say... in person i dont wanna sound stupid. How can i fix this problem... im sure some one out of the 300 users on here has had the same problem, its sad and i need help.
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2 people can keep a secret as long as one is dead

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#24472 - 08/02/02 03:59 AM Re: to much time on the pc
Velocity Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 07/31/02
Posts: 9
Loc: Kentucky
Just don't be afraid of looking stupid. You know I'm not.
_________________________
It's better to burn out than to fade away.

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#24473 - 08/02/02 04:00 AM Re: to much time on the pc
BackSlash Offline
UGN's Resident Homo

Registered: 03/16/02
Posts: 599
Loc: TN
i have the same problem.

solutions:
1) suicide
2) prescribed medication
3) stay indoors, no human interaction
4) wear a paper bag over head when outside
5) take a laptop with you, and force others to type what they want to say to you
_________________________
"It's better to burn out, than to fade away."

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#24474 - 08/02/02 04:38 AM Re: to much time on the pc
fook Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 08/01/02
Posts: 14
Loc: Portland, OR
USE YOUR PIMP JUICE!

Everyone has it, just gotta know what it is and how to use it...

Not all pimp juice is the same from person to person. Like me, talking isnt necessary, its all in the smile baby.

"She only want me for my pimp juice!"
_________________________
486 From Hell

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#24475 - 08/02/02 04:52 AM Re: to much time on the pc
Moffesto Offline
UGN Supporter

Registered: 04/22/02
Posts: 730
Loc: Kuntucky
thanks for the support, im beign serious tho you guys brightened my day. If this problem cant b fixed (" I know it can ") i might have to choose one of those selections backslash.... im not living life like this so ill take no.1
_________________________
2 people can keep a secret as long as one is dead

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#24476 - 08/02/02 06:32 AM Re: to much time on the pc
Curse Offline

Enforcement Admin

Registered: 03/04/02
Posts: 533
Loc: San Andreas
I have the exact oposite problem, I can express myself perfectly, but I feel stupid and stuff online...

Nice solution BackSlash

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#24477 - 08/02/02 07:09 AM Re: to much time on the pc
Moffesto Offline
UGN Supporter

Registered: 04/22/02
Posts: 730
Loc: Kuntucky
in that case, your now my idol jk [Thumb]
_________________________
2 people can keep a secret as long as one is dead

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#24478 - 08/02/02 07:15 AM Re: to much time on the pc
unreal Offline



Registered: 03/01/02
Posts: 860
Loc: KCRQ
I used to have the same problem, actually, until quite recently. I was always told that I had an internet alter-ego, where I was confident. However, once I started actually getting out and getting a life off of a computer, that alter-ego began to fade. Now when you talk to me online, what you see is what you get in real life.

P.S.: What fook said is true. Once you start acting confident in real life, like you have been online, and girls start talking to you as a potential boyfriend instead of a loser, you'll realize that your internet alter-ego is gone.

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#24479 - 08/02/02 08:21 AM Re: to much time on the pc
SilentRage Offline
DollarDNS Owner

Registered: 03/04/02
Posts: 1273
Loc: OH, USA
ya man, unreal knows I'm wid him on this. My 'pimp juice' (I chuckled for a good 60 minutes over that one) is the way I talk. With confidence - humor - and passions - you can really blow a girl away by the way you talk. Witty humor, and talking with animation and charisma will set you apart from more bland people. Confidence shows through in how you act/talk too. Shoot, this isn't just a 'how to get chicks' advice either. If you make a stand for yourself, you can better get guy-friends too and go places and feel like you're somebody.

How do you get confidence? In short, remind yourself of your accomplishments - set realistic goals and fulfill them. Shoot, the mind-trick of repeating something to yourself multiple times will have an impact too. "I am cool, I am cool, I am cool..." It may sound funny, but nobody will laugh if you repeat it to yourself many times in your thoughts. I've actually done that. I haven't always been concieted.

How do you gain passions? Find out what you like really well, and become comfortable in talking about those topics. Some of my passions are music, poetry, love & anger (no, this isn't a joke, some people don't show/handle love or anger too well - well, I love both emotions), romance, the human mind (psychology). Other passions people have are sports and other stuff like that. It doesn't matter if the chick is interested in your passions or not - as long as you show that you have them is a bonus.

How do you gain humor? Start seeing the funny side of EVERYTHING. Then point it out if you can do it in a humorous fashion. Feel free to play with your tone of voice and expressions when making a funny remark. Some people know how to pull crazy remarks at will that are rip-roaring hilarious - I envy them. But one thing I feel I am good at is take a situation and paint it with humor.

--EDIT-- almost forgot to make this point - and it is important. One of the reasons that it may be harder to say stuff in person - is cause you're more exposed. Online, your identity is built off of what you say - or choose to reveal about yourself. In person, other factors are involved in how you act, how you look, how you dress - all that. If you can know yourself REALLY well, and gain that confidence in yourself from knowing, then not only will you be more comfortable in intermingling with other people - but other people will become more comfortable in being with you too. That is the most important, but dressing well - I don't mean prep, dress well for your style - then that helps too.
_________________________
Domain Registration, Hosting, Management
http://www.dollardns.net

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#24480 - 08/02/02 09:01 AM Re: to much time on the pc
unreal Offline



Registered: 03/01/02
Posts: 860
Loc: KCRQ
While we're on this subject: my "pimp juice" is my professionalism (no joke ). As a pilot, I've learned that passengers do not judge your skill as a pilot based solely on the way you handle your aircraft. A huge part of this is how you conduct yourself in the cockpit. If you goof off and act silly, even when flying people you know well, they will not respect you as much as a pilot.

The same goes for real-life scenarios. Think about how people react to someone who has an air of competence and control, versus someone who acts stupid and looks sloppy. Personally, the way I'm able to be confident in social situations is that I go out of my way to be that guy who gives off a professional and competent attitude. Now, think a moment at how many people you see who really act this way? There are relatively few, especially in the age group most people at this board belong to. Having a professional attitude sets you apart from other people, in a good way.

To summarize, here's how I've found to be a great way to gain respect and confidence: Be a gentleman wherever you go (this may sound "old fashioned," but you'd be very surprised to how far you can go if you just show a little of this), dress presentably, keep good posture, maintain eye contact while talking to a person, stay well groomed (personally, I find it hard to take a person seriously when they haven't had a haircut in 6 months, and have some sort of fro goin), and finally, you need to know how to make a good first impression with a person, in order for this whole "professional aura" thing to work. It's a proven fact that in the first 10 seconds (count em') after meeting a person, you have ideas of what this person is about set in stone in your own mind. As unfair as it might seem, if you walk up to a girl and the first word out of your mouth comes out stuttery, she may think you as insecure. Conversely, if you walk up to that same girl, look her in her eyes, talk to her like you respect her (and you should do more than act like you respect her, in my opinion), and do this confidently, her view of you from then on will be a good one.

I could go on and on about this; into body language, and the like, but I think that's a little redundant to what I just said. Most of this is common sense, anyway. This system has helped me be more confident, and have more people respect me in the process.

Quick Edit: When I say dress presentably, I don't mean suit and tie, by any means. I agree with what SR said: dress well for your style. Personally, my style is button-down and polo shirts, and the like.

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