Ok..
Its Valetines Day or any other Day.. but what if you get some message(s) that you dont want? Here is a very good solution..Poems...
(they may be as old as the hills but its just somethin'):

1.
God made the Scottish
God made the Dutch
But when God made you
He didn't make much
2.
You look like Clark Gable (no idea who he is?!)
Your eyes are like his too
But when it comes to kissing
You taste of Irish Stew
3.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
The tap in the kitchen
Reminds me of you-
Drip, Drip, Drip
4.
When I sealed this valentine
My heart began to thump
My hand began to shake
And in my throat there was a lump
You may think I was thinking of you
But no I am allergic to envelope glue
5.
I love you, I love you, I love you, I do
But don't get excited, I love monkeys too
6.
My dearest darling ducky
Behind your ears are mucky
But never mind, love is blind
My dearest darling ducky
7.
You think you are a hard guy
The way you shout and pose
But every time I look at you
Your finger's up your nose
8.
When God was giving out good looks
There was a long, long queue
I was in the middle
But where the hell were you?
9.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Your mother is good looking
What happened to you?
10.
Roses are red
Cabbage is green
My face is funny
But yours is a scream

..just something..
Hope it isnt as tacky as I thought it is..

this is Clark Gable

Heh I foudn it quite entertaining

my favorite part "god made the scottish" hells yeah. he sure did. scottish people kick [censored]. (btw my ancestors are scottish. that's why they are so damn cool)

lol funny, I'm a spiritualist though.