once upon a time...

Posted by: psychogen

once upon a time... - 03/09/02 08:54 PM

...there was a monkey...
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 03/09/02 11:15 PM

Who used to love to get beat....
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 03/09/02 11:18 PM

...off by stanky whores...
Posted by: psychogen

Re: once upon a time... - 03/10/02 12:35 AM

...and had a sexual problem that made him cum before she even got to put her sweet lips upon his dick, but...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 03/10/02 12:37 AM

...he liked to get porked in his *** ...
Posted by: psychogen

Re: once upon a time... - 03/10/02 12:43 AM

..but yet again he was alergic to vaseline and could not take the artificial balck market wooden dildow up that hole, so he got two ribs removed and started sucking his own dick, but then suddendly...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 03/10/02 12:56 AM

...his mom walked in with the woozle ph33rnes and was all...
Posted by: psychogen

Re: once upon a time... - 03/10/02 02:23 AM

... happy to tell avalon to shut up and join the fun as he took avalons dick into his small mouth...but off course the mouth was big enough to take avalons dick as it was no bigger than...
Posted by: Predator

Re: once upon a time... - 03/10/02 02:43 AM

...the heart of a guy who just has lost the love of his life...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 03/10/02 01:33 PM

...cas that hoe pulled it outta his chest and ate it with a side of curley fries...
Posted by: psychogen

Re: once upon a time... - 03/10/02 02:59 PM

...but the monkey had super powers and was able to survive with a high does injection of cuminalin...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 03/10/02 03:58 PM

...and he was one elite h4x0r...
Posted by: fleshwound

Re: once upon a time... - 03/11/02 02:46 AM

hehe.. see.. now that is why i love you guys so much.

*runs around wildly hugging and groping all the boys*

fleshy
Posted by: fearme3

Re: once upon a time... - 03/11/02 03:38 AM

I'm glad you didn't run around hugging me and groping me, I'd have to slap you!
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 03/11/02 09:37 AM

i got groped :x:x:x
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 03/11/02 10:22 AM

Aww... Someone broke the chain before I could say anything... /me bites Fleshwound...
Posted by: unreal

Re: once upon a time... - 03/11/02 01:42 PM

*runs after fleshwound* hey..c'mback! lol
Posted by: ninjaneo

Re: once upon a time... - 03/17/02 12:04 AM

One upon a time there was a hermathodite named...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 03/17/02 12:08 AM

...neo...
Posted by: ninjaneo

Re: once upon a time... - 03/17/02 12:28 AM

:(...that liked to...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 03/17/02 12:47 AM

...get bananna's shoved in his...
Posted by: olosoft

Re: once upon a time... - 03/17/02 01:38 AM

...rear private part and...
Posted by: SephiroX

Re: once upon a time... - 03/17/02 02:35 PM

...eat it out...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 03/17/02 09:10 PM

...with his mom and sister...
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 03/18/02 01:19 PM

...Then he had a sex change and got hit by a huge military blimp...
Posted by: BackSlash

Re: once upon a time... - 03/18/02 03:07 PM

that popped one of his breast implants and
Posted by: psychogen

Re: once upon a time... - 03/26/02 09:04 PM

choked jesus to death...
Posted by: Ender

Re: once upon a time... - 03/28/02 06:43 PM

Before he could jump on the carpenters ...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 03/28/02 06:49 PM

...and she poped the baloon and landed in a generals lap...
Posted by: loanbanker

Re: once upon a time... - 03/28/02 07:13 PM

that was filled with sperm
Posted by: ninjaneo

Re: once upon a time... - 04/27/02 02:36 AM

That Gizmo liked to


...Im sorry I started this lmfao...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 04/27/02 02:48 AM

...stick in neos *** ...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 04/28/02 02:00 AM

...with a Crimping Tool and a bag of tacks...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 04/28/02 08:03 AM

.. and beat him with a timberjack axe ..
Posted by: KkamaKkazi

Re: once upon a time... - 04/28/02 12:48 PM

Is it just me or is this some kind of sick perverted parody of ICP'S dark carnival record?
Because that monkey bananna but thing reminded me of one of their songs called FEARLESS.....some thing about......
I'll stand on a stone and let you trim my toenails with an axe....I'll punch a gorilla and try to run with a bananna hanging out my @55....


Posted by: unreal

Re: once upon a time... - 04/28/02 01:22 PM

Hey ! shh...

Anyway...

..along with a giant banana dildo..
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 04/28/02 02:39 PM

...that he could wield like a broadsword...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 04/28/02 09:16 PM

...and stuck it in random scene whores...
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 04/29/02 08:52 PM

Then Bill Gates went crazy and starting to throw golf balls at people...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 04/29/02 11:30 PM

...while eating sponge cake on rye toast...
Posted by: unreal

Re: once upon a time... - 04/30/02 02:52 AM

..which had mayo and dijon mustard..
Posted by: ?

Re: once upon a time... - 04/30/02 10:25 AM

...which was 2 years old and gave Bill a bad case of Diarrhea and...
Posted by: Soap

Re: once upon a time... - 04/30/02 11:13 AM

automatically hacked root on every PC he came upon thanks to his root-stealing-lamas...
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 04/30/02 01:50 PM

...And then he took off his mask and revieled his true identity...
Posted by: ?

Re: once upon a time... - 04/30/02 02:50 PM

...after his upper lip fell off his mask when he was giving head to all the supreme justices....
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 04/30/02 04:32 PM

... but he choked to death on thick sperm from an unwashed dick...
Posted by: loanbanker

Re: once upon a time... - 04/30/02 04:58 PM

clinicaly he was dead for 4 minutes. When he woke up he was unalert and holding the muffin in a circle jerk.
Posted by: ?

Re: once upon a time... - 04/30/02 08:38 PM

But his charts on the hospital bed were accidently switched with those of a patient that was going to have a sexchange and...
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 04/30/02 10:21 PM

Then Dr. Nick comes in.. Hi kids.. I'm doctor neeeeick. Then Bill Gates wakes up to fine out he is a LLAMA! MAAAAAAA a walking talking llama!!!
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 04/30/02 11:31 PM

... Then Dr. Nick jams his penis into Billy Goats *** ...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/01/02 04:18 PM

.... but then the war started and everyone, even the goat, was drafted...
Posted by: Imperial

Re: once upon a time... - 05/01/02 05:53 PM

...by the devoted men and women fighting the huge, hairy penguin menace on mars...but then Batman said....

-----
"By the way, can you hear the past? Can you see the past? Right now? Can you
hear the future? See it? It's just not there. Well, you might say, 'there's a place
for me someday ever so far away. A god to glorify, a chance to live again, and
someday we'll all be free.' Well…all that's bull****. Only suckers hope for the
future. The only time is right now."
--Alan Watts
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 05/01/02 06:04 PM

...These tights are riding up on me. Starting to get a rash...
Posted by: unreal

Re: once upon a time... - 05/01/02 06:52 PM

..and Catwoman just sex0red me..
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 05/01/02 09:43 PM

...So now my nuts are sticking to my legs but she was...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/01/02 10:19 PM

...whipping out a huge black penis and ****ing Unreal in the *** ...
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/01/02 10:49 PM

... Then Unreal screams estastically as he reaches orgasm from the big black dick, and then Gizmo says...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 05/01/02 10:49 PM

... stop yelling you stupid slunt ...
... but unreal kept yelling gizzy, so a little moguai drove in ridin his hacker hummer ...
Posted by: ninjaneo

Re: once upon a time... - 05/01/02 10:52 PM

Then the UPIN lackey's step in and snap the dix in half only to find that...
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/01/02 10:56 PM

...Neo is really Fyvush Finkle from the show Boston Public, and he lied about him really being a 87 year old ***ish man... oh wait, he wasn't lying, then someone...
Posted by: ninjaneo

Re: once upon a time... - 05/01/02 11:00 PM

shot curse in the head and noticed that the black dick was really a
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/01/02 11:06 PM

... a piece of Neo's Dads' Beef Jerkey...
Posted by: ninjaneo

Re: once upon a time... - 05/01/02 11:09 PM

... that he makes by sitting on a bag of his cum for a week...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/01/02 11:12 PM

... and repeatedly sucking it in and pushing it out if his *** untill it becomes hardened Jerky and coated in **** to make it teryaki...
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 05/02/02 08:12 PM

BUT NO ONE FIGURED THE GOAT WAS BEHIND IT ALL!!! MWAHAHA! *the goat pulls out an m249 Para SAW, glasting away as he falls on his hind legs* *baaaaa*
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 05/02/02 08:38 PM

...Till someone threw a gernade and blew up the **** goat, Learner could be heard laughing till...
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/02/02 09:28 PM

... Someone pointed out that Learner's fly is down...
Posted by: Crime

Re: once upon a time... - 05/02/02 09:40 PM

....but only curse noticed that Learner's fly is down, because he was stareing at learners cock the whole time....
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/02/02 09:42 PM

...But then it turns out Curse never existed and he is just a figment of all UGN member's and Police official's imaginations and that Crime was really staring because he created 'Curse' in his mind just like that dude in Fight Club did...
Posted by: Crime

Re: once upon a time... - 05/02/02 09:44 PM

THE END !
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/02/02 10:09 PM

...or so we think, because Crime takes it up the butt...
Posted by: ninjaneo

Re: once upon a time... - 05/02/02 10:14 PM

with Neo's dads bad of hardend cum (aka Jerky)
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/02/02 10:17 PM

...like a piston while he flosses his teeth with anal hair...
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/03/02 12:17 PM

... That he had shaved off of Robin Wiilliams' *** and decided to eat, then he somehow tries to blame it on Curse, but then everyone laughs at him because Curse never existed anyplace but Crime's own mind...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/03/02 12:22 PM

...because Crime's head is smeared with **** after realizing you can't eat out a guy...
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/03/02 12:33 PM

... Then Neo turns and says "that's not true" to Deffy, then Neo bends back over and lets Crime finish, then Deffy...
Posted by: SephiroX

Re: once upon a time... - 05/03/02 12:37 PM

....pushes neo aside and stick a 2 inch dildo in neos mouth to keep him busy while deffy motions crime to go to him....
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/03/02 12:44 PM

...as I pull a 12 Gauge Shotgun and shoots Crime and Neo in the face...
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/03/02 12:44 PM

... And around this time in Israel ten years ealier, Sephirox was being conceived when his mother, a Palistinian wench, was getting boned but Seph's dad, a 4'11" tall mentally retarded Rabbi named Yitzak Griffman...
Posted by: olosoft

Re: once upon a time... - 05/03/02 02:48 PM

...who was being taught how to harness real ultimate power by becoming a fedi ninja by the awesome, and by awesome i mean totaly sweet, crime. however...
Posted by: unreal

Re: once upon a time... - 05/03/02 05:57 PM

..the dark spirit of the goat escaped the body and started brooding in the forests, waiting for the time to strike again..
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/03/02 07:04 PM

...as Unreal spreads his *** cheeks in anticipation for some hot goat dick...
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 05/03/02 09:48 PM

...When all of the sudden the ghost busters show up and capture the ghost of the goat. Meanwhile...
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 05/03/02 11:31 PM

Then we the goats sidekick comes to the rescue... THE EVIL COW!!! M0000 M0000 m000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 and he has an M79 grenade launcher. AHHHH and then.... m00?
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/04/02 01:10 AM

... Then UGN's imaginary friend Curse appears and after being annoyed by constant cow noise decides that it is time for some beef jerky, so then Curse whips out a semi-auto .12 shot gun, and goes up to the cow and tips it over, then Curse runs to the local Quicky-Mart and uses the shot gun to attain some free beef jerky, but then the **** hits the fan as Curse tries to leave and notices...
Posted by: ?

Re: once upon a time... - 05/04/02 03:12 AM

...and all of the sudden the heavens opened and down came ...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 05/04/02 10:55 AM

...a little moguai...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/04/02 08:51 PM

...backed by 187 1337 migdet ninjas...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 05/04/02 08:58 PM

...aim ak47's at...
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 05/04/02 10:00 PM

...The cow and the ghostbusters but...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/04/02 10:38 PM

... Ripp Taylor comes in with a bag of confetti and Richard Simmons...
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 05/04/02 10:52 PM

..showed up talking about his new diet. if he catches you he can have you. So you are bound to run miles and miles. with that he starts chasing...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/04/02 11:06 PM

... with his big hard on, everyone runs away, except for Digital Phun...
Posted by: Crime

Re: once upon a time... - 05/04/02 11:29 PM

....because DP wanted a fat cock in his *** , an he knew that richard would give it to him because....
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 05/05/02 10:06 AM

..richard is his daddy..
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 05/05/02 03:07 PM

But the Tae-Bo guy came out to confront Richard Simmons... DUN DUN DUN!!!
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/05/02 05:39 PM

...and then a million GI Joe figures drove after Billy Blanks and Richard Simmons, guns a blazin...
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/05/02 10:15 PM

...But then some fitness guru chick and her army of Power Ranger figures appear(many of which are barrowed from Neo and DP), and then they begin to battle but then Crime...
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 05/06/02 02:51 PM

Puked all over them with an acid like vomit, blinding them all and burning their flesh. THEN
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/06/02 10:27 PM

...out of nowhere a Tank bust through a wall and a group of Paratroopers and Jamaican Protesters with Guns abd Bricks...
Posted by: Crime

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 12:31 AM

....with bricks of hash and weed, then we all got blazed, until neo, with his gayness, bugged us all out with a....
Posted by: Crime

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 12:33 AM

....gay song and dance number, but then seph said....
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 10:58 AM

...stop or i'll make dp DoS j00!...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 11:31 AM

...so we grabbed a rock and a stick and beat Seph with our Denial of Life Attack...
Posted by: Crime

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 12:11 PM

....then seph cried out for help, and neo came running, so caved in his skull with a rock too, and then.....
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 12:20 PM

...everyone shot a load in neo's skull...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 12:21 PM

...so we had to squeegee the floor so no one slipped on the...
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 02:01 PM

... On the bloody-cum goo, then DP smelled the mixture of male reproductive juices and got a hard on and came running but then he slipped on...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 02:06 PM

...a pile of **** and blood caused by an anal bead party gone horribly wrong...
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 02:16 PM

AND THEN THE RIOT POLICE CAME WITH SHIELDS, NIGHT STICKS, CS GAS, AND RUBBER BULLETS!!! THEN!!!! LOL
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 02:38 PM

... Curse(TM) UGN's imaginary friend whips out his Lil' Bastard Anti-Riot Police Kit, but then he drops it and everything falls into a sewage treatment containment unit, but then an unknown UGN member jumps in to save it and ingests human fecal matter and lots of nasty ****, and it turns out that unknown UGN member is...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 02:41 PM

...our fearless leader Gizmo, taking a shot or two for the team...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 03:10 PM

.. ::gets hit by rubber bullets:: OW **** THOSE HURT, SON OF A BITCH ::grabs AK47:: DIE BITCH! ::spots car:: and out comes...
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 03:28 PM

...bob dole...
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 03:59 PM

AND THEN! The infamous man of randomness "hKzKnight" comes out of no where and says... THE COW REALLY DID JUMP OVER THE MOON!!! Then he dissappears and everyone stands there for 2 mins stunned asking WHAT THE **** WAS THAT? THEN back to the fighting.
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 05:40 PM

...Deffy shakes his head then shoots hKzKnight in the face and makes sure he's dead...
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 07:35 PM

...Learner verifies, yup no pulse, that is one dead lamer. Learner shakes Defcons hand. Defcon then...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/07/02 11:37 PM

...Gizmo gives Deffy Co-Adminship, the Congressional Medal of Honor, a Million Dollars and a Cruiseship full of fine whores, and Deffy sails away, and is out of the story...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 05/08/02 12:14 AM

..then neo jumps on deffys yaght and caps him in the head with the ninja quickness and then...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/08/02 08:07 AM

...then to neo's horror he finds that that was not Deffy but a Deffy-Robot that turns around and cuts off neo's head with a Katana...
Posted by: Soap

Re: once upon a time... - 05/08/02 10:54 AM

...which was actually a light-saber OBI-wan had left over all st00ned of his face last night when dropping by to see if...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 05/08/02 01:19 PM

...tosee if deffy had any spare condoms and a cup of sugar so that...
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 05/08/02 02:54 PM

Yet hKzKnight comes back and runs around saying haha you thought I was dead, then runs off a cliff because wasn't looking then died. The pengiuns then carried their fellow comrade away.
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/08/02 03:07 PM

... But it turns out those Penguines weren't really the aquatic birds we thought they were, but they were really Sephy's family members, three feet tall and round, and then mysteriously Crime...
Posted by: Crime

Re: once upon a time... - 05/08/02 03:34 PM

....doesnt reply....
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 05/08/02 03:56 PM

then the skies opened... It started to rain cats and dogs... w00f w00f me0w baaaa... where the hell dat come from? Then...
Posted by: unreal

Re: once upon a time... - 05/08/02 06:28 PM

..a stray bullet tears into hKzKnight..

die.
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 05/08/02 08:31 PM

HEY, I thought I was dead (2x) what the hell is this... That's it I'm leaving... hKzKnight gets held hostage from a crew of Polar Bears because of his connection with the nix penguins... Then it rained fishes and hamsters.
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/10/02 12:06 AM

... Then ...
Posted by: Soap

Re: once upon a time... - 05/10/02 06:04 AM

aaaawww....**** man....i'm outta breath....
Posted by: unreal

Re: once upon a time... - 05/10/02 11:40 AM

..unreal creates a jeet task force and infiltrates the polar bear compound in search of hKzKnight. Upon finding hKzKnight huddled in a corner of the jail cell, the task force proceeds to..
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/10/02 12:41 PM

... Remove hKzKnight's training bra and female clothing and beat him for dressing like the chick he thinks he is, but then unreal says...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 05/10/02 12:45 PM

...**** your *** looks tight :)! Then he procieded to...
Posted by: unreal

Re: once upon a time... - 05/10/02 12:48 PM

..bust out a Glock 21 and put a hole in hKzKnight's head.. die.
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/10/02 12:52 PM

... Then /me gathers up a lynch mod of UGN members and we take hKzKnight's body and crusify him, but suddenly...
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 05/10/02 03:14 PM

hKzKnight is back to life and everyone is like what the **** is with this guy? Why can't he die. Yet the truth be told, hKzKnight was never a real person, yet a hologram made by UGN for no real reason just to make up for lost times of watching a really weird nut case go around the forums. Then suddenly Gizmo turns on the tv to found out...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/10/02 08:11 PM

...that the football game is on, so he sat down and watched contently with a beer and chips...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 05/10/02 10:50 PM

...then he terminated hKzKnight's program out of boredom, and replaces his life with a very small shell script. But just as Gizmo hits enter...
Posted by: unreal

Re: once upon a time... - 05/10/02 10:51 PM

..unreal has 0wned Gizzy's boxen, pulling a 'shutdown -r now' just as Gizzy starts the script..
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: once upon a time... - 05/10/02 10:52 PM

then the world implodes and they all die, k?
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/10/02 10:53 PM

...he realized that the tiniest shell script would be too big to fill the gap of hKzKnight's former "life"...
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 05/11/02 12:41 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by QueerMushroom:
then the world implodes and they all die, k?


How do we do it, no one can die here **** it! I would like to have you know my storage is 1982344kb! (hkzknight notices people are laughing at his storage)
Posted by: ?

Re: once upon a time... - 05/11/02 02:29 AM

and after all this bull**** the nice people at UGN realize that this has gone too far...but suddenly....
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 05/11/02 12:37 PM

...UGN will self destruct in t minux 5 minutes and counting...
Posted by: unreal

Re: once upon a time... - 05/11/02 12:55 PM

What Gizzy failed to mention was that the only thing in UGN that did self destruct was the computer holding hKzKnight's shell script...finally, hKzKnight is dead..
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/12/02 12:03 AM

... Then Curse uses his leet0 first aid skills to make sure hKzKnight is really dead, but suddenly unreal...
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 05/12/02 12:33 AM

brought hkzKnight back to life. Then the muffin man started to fight the gingerbread man causing the internet 2...
Posted by: Soap

Re: once upon a time... - 05/12/02 11:18 AM

kill hkzknight !!!!

(has this topic gone horribly wrong?? WE're all determined to make sure hkzknight dies...even though we all know he can't ;-)
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 05/12/02 12:24 PM

hKzKnight runs around in the storm going haha. So tru eh soap... Then as laughing hKzKnight suddenly drops dead... 4 min later a bolt of lightning strikes him and then he comes back and everyone goes ahhhh **** sob is back and it just winds up everyone kills them selves instead causing the c0ws to...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 05/12/02 02:26 PM

...Tear through hKz's flesh with their teath, then after theive de-maled him crime procieded to...
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 05/12/02 10:16 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Gizmo:
...Tear through hKz's flesh with their teath, then after theive de-maled him crime procieded to...


LOL you mean teeth there giz? lol... Crime brings back hKzKnight and hKzKnight goes screw you guys i;m going home, he leaves to his forum never returning where he can be killed for the 10 th time.
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/13/02 12:52 PM

...Then Curse decides to use his Moderator power and edit all of hKzKnights posts unless he dies and phucking stays dead, and hKzKnight gets killed by...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/13/02 12:57 PM

...Defcon, as he screams "Fu¢k this" and charges his pulse rifle and his Popemoblie and rides off into battle...
Posted by: Crime

Re: once upon a time... - 05/13/02 07:19 PM

...then deffy's Pope-moblie gets a flat, and deffy has to pull over and change tires, and then, all of a sudden....
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/13/02 09:09 PM

... Crime's ego becomes so big that it explodes, causing a chain reaction within Seph's...
Posted by: unreal

Re: once upon a time... - 05/14/02 12:00 PM

..pussy, which then collides with Curse's..
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/14/02 12:43 PM

...wooden, tie dyed, hippy dildo with built in squirt gun to simulate ejactulation...
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/14/02 09:06 PM

... Within Defcon's *** (yes he has *** ejeculations), and it turns out the Curse just bought it for Defcon for his birthday, but suddenly...
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 05/15/02 09:02 PM

Learner teaches they kids about fake snatches. But then...
Posted by: ?

Re: once upon a time... - 05/16/02 02:04 AM

...Bin Laden finally digs himself up from the ruins of his cave and he orders unreal to fly a plane right into hKzKnight. Unreal, still not fully trained to fly an F-16 gets in the jet, and just as he launches off....
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 05/16/02 02:46 AM

He is told he dosen't have too cause hKzKnight is already dead. It is his clone that is running around, but they just killed the clone and destroyed all DNA samples, there is no misstake about it, they are all burned up. So then George Bush stimulates the economy...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/16/02 12:08 PM

...by starting another war, this time declaring Canada to be a Terrorist nation and vows to rid North America of any religion except for Christianity...
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 05/20/02 07:20 PM

Learner says fuck dat and pushes the button. A nuke fals on every charater in this story they all die, even those who died.

Moral of the story.... Learner has the last word

/me runs
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/20/02 10:42 PM


Hey, pre-maturely ending a story is no better then pre-maturely ejaculating, actually it may be a sign of it, so if your name isn't or shouldn't be Quicky McLoseload then don't end the story so soon, lol
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/21/02 12:40 PM

Yeah but lets talk about THE STORY EPISODE II:

The next day, Learner goes too touch himself...
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 05/21/02 07:40 PM

He reaches in he pants and pulls out his 8 foot schlong. It is masive, ladies come for miles to get a gander. and Learner spends the rest of the story pleasing everyones mom..... <img src=" title="" src="graemlins/devil.gif" />
Posted by: Crime

Re: once upon a time... - 05/21/02 07:43 PM

...and dad, because learner swings both ways because he is a fag becaus....
Posted by: hackerb0b

Re: once upon a time... - 05/21/02 07:52 PM

Meanwhile jason is out stealing all the ladies with his crazy pussy licking skills
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/21/02 07:55 PM

...then Jason realizes he's gay so Learner and Jason start having passionate buttsex while Visage helps get Learner off by peeing in his mouth while Learner fists his ass...
Posted by: hackerb0b

Re: once upon a time... - 05/21/02 09:33 PM

and then jason implodes into dust never to be seen again (and all along he wasnt gay)
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/21/02 09:34 PM

... But then Jello Biafra shows up and...
Posted by: hackerb0b

Re: once upon a time... - 05/21/02 09:34 PM

and then jason implodes into dust never to be seen again (and all along he wasnt gay)
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/22/02 02:02 PM

...But then, Jason comes back and marries Boy George, but suddenly...
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 05/26/02 09:40 AM

Curse decides he must un-marry them, because jason took his life-long butt-lover away. He races toward Jason with divorce papers and a watergun.
Curse puts the gun to Jason's head telling him to give up his hubby or take the water guy in his ass. Given the ultimatun, Jason decides he never really liked Boy George anyway (all he wanted was money for a new computer)...but just when Jason is about to sign the divorce papers.....
Posted by: thebluegiant

Re: once upon a time... - 05/26/02 09:50 AM

...Boy George starts singing why can't we be friends, curse realizes his hidden desires, rips of his, jasons and Boy Georges clothes, grabs Boy George by the shoulders and . . .
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 05/26/02 10:40 AM

curse pulls out his purple and pink water gun that he kept *just in case* He motions for Jason to come and get it, but Jason doesn't want a water gun in his ass (though he thought it sounded a little sekzy) [Yum]
So Jason grabs crime and starts beating him with......
Posted by: Grifter

Re: once upon a time... - 05/26/02 11:34 AM

his moms purple man love doll, that has red and yellow....
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/26/02 08:46 PM

...penis that crooks like a hook, mostly because of the rubber bands that are needed to keep it hard because...
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 05/28/02 07:01 AM

The doll is made entirely out of edible underwear. So, while Jason was beating the **** out of crime, Boy George and his new ass b/eating crew (consisted of Giz, neo, unreal, and defcon) came to help george consume the entire doll. While they were consuming one edible panty after another.......
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 05/28/02 10:37 AM

...gizmo pulled out his sawd off shotgun and pumped boy gorge fulla lead, then neo grabed a gernade and jamed it up gorge's ass, after they ran away...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/28/02 11:48 AM

...We all take turns fondling Skippy and putting peanut butter in her hair and realizing that George looks like a Pirate and has a black beard...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 05/28/02 01:18 PM

::looks at boy jorge:: OMG ITS BEARD! then...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/28/02 01:24 PM

...then a team of Ninja's under the control of Deffy pop up and go to town chopping up people...
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 05/28/02 02:04 PM

/Me scoops the peanut butter out of her hair and tastes it. /me is going to kill deffy (and his ninja clones) cause it was the crunchy kind... Just as skippy is ready to shut deffy's pee pee in a door.......
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 05/28/02 02:12 PM

...but then Milhouse aka thebluegiant mysteriously catches on fire(never burn down Curse's house), and the flames appear to be fueled by his new Magnesium suit Curse gave him for Satanmas™, then suddenly...
Posted by: thebluegiant

Re: once upon a time... - 05/28/02 02:44 PM

TheBlueGiant (aka Millhouse) jumps into his freezer which puts out the flames and then begins planning his revenge on curse by...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/28/02 03:23 PM

...Grabbing Skippys head then slamming it in a steel door, then anally rapes Curse's Girlfriend with a dildo covered in vaginal goo that has siphilus, genital worts, and other nasties (This seemed to have been pulled out of Skippy)...
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 05/28/02 06:46 PM

But it wasn't pulled out of Skippy...It was pulled straight outta Deffy's ass. (I mean...the doctor told him not to solicit sex from bag ladies).....
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 05/29/02 10:42 AM

...then deffy grabbed a large pole and...
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/29/02 11:35 AM

...Shoves it straight up Skippy's ass, causing her to leak her disease fluid and prove once and for all that the dildo was hers... and yes Skippy's mom is not a bag lady but still on easy lay...
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 05/29/02 07:43 PM

......kinda like Deffy's grandmom, who taught Deffy all his super l3370 skills, by shoving a fone in and out of his ass, playing neil diamond tunes with his red box. As for skippy, she got rid of all her imaginary STDs, but Deffy went out and got head from........
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 05/29/02 08:31 PM

Guess whos back? Guess whos back? 2 girls around.... WAIT FUCK DAT! FUCK The real slim shady... hkzknight is back... Come my squad of attacking sheep, JUMP! [Sheep] [Sheep] [Sheep] [Thumb] ... The sheep started to burn the villages, children, men, AND THOSE DAMN COWS... Then the sheep...
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: once upon a time... - 05/29/02 09:38 PM

got ass raped by..
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 05/30/02 09:51 PM

neo, of course.... and his band of voloptuous shemale stripper friends that liked to ...........
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 05/31/02 04:50 PM

Give head to gizzy, While the sheep were getting ass, Learner Opens fire on the sheep, cause thats just sick

Then Learner openes fire on hKzKnight with his supper 1337 cannon which kills even people who come back from the dead.

Everyone seems to rejoyce
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 05/31/02 06:17 PM

/Me shakes my head in disgust. You guys are [i]never[/u] going to kill him. But then, one of the shemales came up to learner, and he...h
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 05/31/02 06:49 PM

Let it give me head. heh, When all of the sudden Skippy...

(what it's been a while, it's half female right?)
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 05/31/02 07:08 PM

...gets abducted by the French Army and they fly away stuffing cheese and wine down her throat while being rude, meanwhile Deffy contimplates editing or deleting posts of dead people...
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 05/31/02 10:58 PM

The shemale bit learners dick off... AHAHA! It happens... As hkzknight hops into his penguin machine and vanishes again (as he laughs and says you can't kill me... I'm already dead...)... [Sheep] then the penguin has rocket packs and they shoot into space not to be found till some other day lol.
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 06/01/02 11:20 AM

then /me comes up with a machette and kills the shemale who was already choking because she had Learner's dick stuck in her throat. /me laughs hysterically as she hands learner his dick back. Then she slaps learner for being a sick son of a bitch and letting the shemale near his dick in the first place. Learner starts crying so she kicks him to the ground. He curls up in the fetal position and crys and crys, until.....

(sorry for making you look like a pussy..learner.... )
Posted by: unreal

Re: once upon a time... - 06/01/02 01:20 PM

..Curse comes along, with his..

(200th post in this topic)
Posted by: thebluegiant

Re: once upon a time... - 06/01/02 01:29 PM

...dwarf testes...
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 06/01/02 08:14 PM

and slaps them on learner's head. This, learner thought, was kinda sekzy, so he.....
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 06/02/02 08:27 PM

...sex0red a tub of cottage cheese...
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 06/03/02 06:57 PM

The cottage cheese was old (as if old milk could any worse). The smell made him sick, so he puked all over Deffy (and oh all the disgusting things learner had eaten). /me points and laughs, but feels bad for deffy, so....
Posted by: Defcon

Re: once upon a time... - 06/04/02 01:13 PM

she goes to clean up... but then Deffy ambushes her with 1000 angry hardline Chaos Kids and starts hitting Skippy with a bat, then...
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 06/04/02 07:25 PM

Learner bitch slaps skippy with his dick. Wake up you were dreaming he says. Learner then listens to what skippy was dreaming about and tells her she is sick. But then...
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 06/04/02 09:32 PM

...Curse decides to check this post and noticed that unreal got him re-involved, so Curse packs his ice pick in his bandana and puts it on a stick and begins to hop some trians to unreal's house so he can do away with him, but then Deffy says...
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 06/04/02 10:08 PM

...well, at least curse was trying to figure out what deffy was saying, until skippy decided to kick his ass for no apparent reason, except that she could because she is super ****ing tough. Then she beat the living tar out of learner (you smack me with it again and i'll have neo do dirty things to you that do not involve those cucumbers you are so fond of.) Learner runs and hides from skippy's threats, which seem to be very real. Everyone on the board realizes that he is a pussy, so they...
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 06/06/02 10:53 PM

...Go and talk to him cause they are his freinds. Gizzy asks Learner why the fuck he ran from a girl. Learner says your right. Gose back bitch slaps skippy with his dick again and laughs. Skippy runs off crying. [Joker]
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 06/06/02 11:34 PM

...But then while Learner is sitting in his house drinking beer, he hears a knock on the door, and a man in a tie hands him an envelope and says "*Learner's Real Name*, consider yourself served' and he opens the envelope to find a surpena because Skippy is sueing him for back child support payments, then UGN finds out that Learner and Skippy were once married and have twelve half-African/half-Hatian kids, but then unreal gets a knock and on his door and...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 06/06/02 11:36 PM

...curse kicks him in the nads...
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 06/07/02 09:17 PM

Learner realises he is found out, Still says I anit payin for those bastards. She better go find the dad. <img src=" title="" src="graemlins/pissed.gif" />

Just at that moment Curse's foot is broken for kicking unreal in his steal nads
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 06/08/02 08:36 AM

Skippy decides that learner is not the father, and would never sleep with him. They actually got married while Skippy was drunk in a Las Vegas chapel. *Learner wishes that he could have a girl like her....
Then, Skippy puts all the little kiddies to work on a farm and makes more than enough money to cover the measly money that learner wouldn't have made anyhow.( [Angel] <----- I wouldn't ever really do that...) Then, learner....
Posted by: Le4rner

Re: once upon a time... - 06/08/02 09:58 PM

blows his brains out and is out of the story. After learner went splat....
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 06/09/02 06:34 PM

... Curse handed Seph a mop and told him to clean Le4rner off the board because this isn't the Anarchy forum so dead bodies don't look right and are bad for business, then...
Posted by: SephiroX

Re: once upon a time... - 06/09/02 06:45 PM

Seph says "Me? Clean? BAH!!!!"
and hands the mop to phun, because thats his part in his family mob.. the janitor...
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 06/11/02 08:06 PM

skippy feels bad for phun, so she takes out some of her child slave labor money and pays someone to clean it for him. Skippy........
Posted by: SephiroX

Re: once upon a time... - 06/13/02 10:33 AM

...then finds out that Dp is just a homeless guy that was born to clean, so she finnaly regrets what she had done. So she takes back all the labor money and puts DP back to work...

Meanwhile, back at Crimes house, the box.....
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 06/13/02 11:14 AM

... Arrives, and to Crime's astonishment Curse is not inside, but really there is...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 06/13/02 03:17 PM

-note- when this thread hits 15 pages it will be closed -note-
Posted by: hKzKnight

Re: once upon a time... - 06/13/02 06:20 PM

HOOAH!!! Lez go 15, *me runs away*
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 06/16/02 08:12 AM

/Me smiles... 15, eh?

But, anyway....... there once was a monkey... (I'm starting this over, lets make it even better)
Posted by: Grifter

Re: once upon a time... - 06/16/02 09:14 AM

who had 3 nipples.....
Posted by: SephiroX

Re: once upon a time... - 06/16/02 02:49 PM

But then Crime arives home and finds the note.
after reading the message, he crumbles the paper up and says to gizmo.....
Posted by: Grifter

Re: once upon a time... - 06/16/02 03:19 PM

This is a note! wait yes no wait yes BEHIND YOU, then outa nowere grifter jumps behind him and chops off his ears then grifter pulls a large
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 06/17/02 01:22 PM

... Then Curse begins to think that Grifter is a crack head, so Curse grabs his crack head beating pipe(which in reallity is just a lead pipe he stole from a construction site) and he whaps the shit out of Grifter until he swears he'll never do crack again, then Curse finishes him off, puts him in a bag, and throws him in a river, then...
Posted by: Grifter

Re: once upon a time... - 06/17/02 02:14 PM

then amazingly curse finds out it wasnt grifter at all but was skippy he was beating....and when curse turns around grifter chops off both his arms with a......
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 06/17/02 10:00 PM

With a Regeneration Sword, so Curse's limbs grow back almost instantly, then Curse whaps the real Grifter and puts him in a large trash bag then dumps him in a river near where Skippy was dumped, then Curse has a horse head with a "I'm sorry I had your daughter killed" Card From Hallmark's Mafia series sent to Skippy's parents...
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 06/20/02 11:27 PM

of course, both grifter and curse have no idea how sad Skippy's parents and friends are. But, they also don't know that it wasn't really Skippy they killed, but curses's girl friend trying to be like her. So now, the only girl? that would date curse has been killed, and Skippy goes back home to tell her family and friends that she is okay, and both Curse and Grifter are dumbasses. Skippy takes the Mafia Halmark card and shoves it up.....
Posted by: KkamaKkazi

Re: once upon a time... - 06/28/02 12:00 AM

shoves it up where?
Posted by: Grifter

Re: once upon a time... - 06/28/02 04:20 PM

shoves it up her own ass cause she likes it like that, then skippys mom walks in and.......
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 06/29/02 03:47 PM

...Screams but not out of disgust, she screamed with a sexual type moan, and joined in with Skippy, but then Unreal...
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 06/30/02 01:20 AM

realises that Grifter is a dumbass because he knows (from personal experience ) that you can't possibly get pleasure from shoving a greeting card up your ass./me shakes head
and the entire UGN community realises that grifter is on some serious crack, but they all lurve him anyway. but, there is just one problem...
Posted by: Deviation187

Re: once upon a time... - 06/30/02 02:34 AM

everyone later found out that the now turd covered Greeting card was accidently mailed to...
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 06/30/02 06:25 AM

...blackbeard with lubbens...
Posted by: Cyrez

Re: once upon a time... - 06/30/02 12:56 PM

wow this has been goin on for 10 threads or whatever 230 somthin replies i think this is a record..
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 06/30/02 09:13 PM

Cyrez gets put in shackles and gets his ass kicked (or licked in Deffy's case ) by everyone at UGN for interrupting the thread. Gizmo gets a little too excited about the spankings, so....
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 07/01/02 04:59 AM

... he pulls out his AK47 and shoves it up cyrez's ass, but just before he could squeeze the trigger...
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 07/01/02 06:22 AM

he realises there is no ammo for the gun... hell, it's fake anyway. He got it at Chuckie Cheese for 380 tickets. Cyrez thanks the god in which he believes, but he really probably shouldn't just yet, because.....
Posted by: Gremelin

Re: once upon a time... - 07/01/02 10:14 AM

...Gizmo pulls out his glock and pulls the trigger, he caps the little jew in the head and skippy...
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 07/01/02 11:56 AM

thinks "damn.. german gun, jewish victim" , but /me only thinks for a second about it before walking away, absentmindedly. But, of course, Gizmo's aim was a little off and Cyrez is still alive, so he...
Posted by: skippy

Re: once upon a time... - 07/09/02 05:26 PM

He screams at all of UGN to go to 15 pages on this post
Posted by: Curse

Re: once upon a time... - 07/10/02 01:03 AM

... Then Curse grabs his Luger and shouts "ack, Mein Fuhrer" and leads Skippy, and all those story interupting people onto a train car and ships them to Israel via train(it's a magical train), then Seph meets his real dad, Rabbi Griffman(as mentioned on the first page), and then...