Moffesto, I don't think anyone here is going to be willing to direct you on the path of 'lamer.' I'm not trying to be an ass, but that's not what we're about here at UGN
You could however, try to take this opportunity to learn a thing or 2 about web programming on your own. I reccommend http://www.programmingtutorials.com
or Le4rner's site - I forgot what it's called. And of course Google is always your friend.