This was from IRC Last Night, posted by me for your viewing pleasure:
[Mon:20:14:03] mach 3 razor + shaving private areas = bad idea
[Mon:20:14:17] Impy...
[Mon:20:14:30] did you shave your groin.... damn I have lost so much respect for you
[Mon:20:14:34] *** ReverendNinjaSox has joined #undergroundnews
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[Mon:20:14:37] 'Lo.
[Mon:20:14:39] dude!
[Mon:20:14:43] Dude!
[Mon:20:14:48] Sweet!
[Mon:20:14:50] no way, if you shave them they will play with them
[Mon:20:14:57] guaranteed
[Mon:20:15:08] yeah girls dont like hair stuick in their teeth
[Mon:20:15:22] Gods...
[Mon:20:15:35] I didn't shave them compeltely
[Mon:20:15:38] completely
[Mon:20:15:40] why do I keep coming back here
[Mon:20:15:47] well, no, just tidy the house up a bit
[Mon:20:15:48] feel like a damn kid that just hit puberty
[Mon:20:15:50] =)
[Mon:20:16:03] I hope you get severe razor burn Impy
[Mon:20:16:10] I did
[Mon:20:16:22] I've got 5 layers of gold bond medicated powder on them
[Mon:20:16:26] only porno freaks shave their pubes
[Mon:20:16:27] tingles
[Mon:20:16:27] I'll be right back. Cooking.
[Mon:20:16:37] Impy; schick extreme 3 = nut friendly
[Mon:20:16:56] fuck razors...I'm getting some nair
[Mon:20:17:00] no!
[Mon:20:17:01] lol
[Mon:20:17:04] Impy NO!
[Mon:20:17:09] lol
[Mon:20:17:10] IT WILL BURN YOU!!!
[Mon:20:17:13] My buddy did it
[Mon:20:17:15] rofl
[Mon:20:17:25] he was fucking crying his eyes out
[Mon:20:17:29] ouch nair sucks
[Mon:20:17:31] lol!
[Mon:20:17:44] begging me to cut his unit off, just to stop the pain
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[Mon:20:17:56] the area all above my member bled...NEVER GO AGAINST THE HAIR
[Mon:20:18:16] dude Impy... you don't even know how to shave your face yet...
[Mon:20:18:19] I wanted it close...and tidy...BAH! pain!
[Mon:20:18:22] You shouldn't be shaving your balls
[Mon:20:18:57] haha
[Mon:20:19:06] I should take pictures...
[Mon:20:20:01] oh so smooth though...
[Mon:20:20:10] * Imperial should get some silk boxers
[Mon:20:20:22] yeah, but once you start there's no going back. stubble is a bitch
[Mon:20:20:38] could let it get stubbly and wait it out I guess
[Mon:20:20:49] and itch your nuts off, literally
[Mon:20:20:51] why not wax it
[Mon:20:20:53] yeah...
[Mon:20:21:12] I'd rather eat the tub of nads than use it to rip my nuts off
[Mon:20:21:25] ok.. all i can say is: don't try to have sex when it's all stubbly.. it hurts the girl!
[Mon:20:21:50] see I was thinking that too...would a shaved girl really enjoy a big hairy man bush on her
[Mon:20:22:08] haha...what if it tickled...
[Mon:20:22:55] ugh...
[Mon:20:22:58] * Imperial itches
[Mon:20:23:09] it's really only a problem when the hair is all short and prickly
[Mon:20:23:14] otherwise.. i don't think it matters
[Mon:20:23:21] Someone log this and then post it
[Mon:20:23:26] well fuck, if I'd known that...
[Mon:20:23:41] oh.. Nair works well...
[Mon:20:23:46] now I have half shaven nuts
[Mon:20:23:54] lol
[Mon:20:24:02] then sahve the other half
[Mon:20:24:07] shave it too
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[Mon:20:24:16] no, I refuse to fuck with them until it's healed
[Mon:20:24:25] dear god
[Mon:20:24:27] hehe
[Mon:20:24:28] you didn't dry shave them did you?
[Mon:20:24:36] no
[Mon:20:24:39] or use a straight razor?
[Mon:20:24:45] I had shaving cream an everything
[Mon:20:24:48] and
[Mon:20:24:56] come on Impy... be a man, get a straight razor and foam
[Mon:20:24:59] it works better if the shaving cream is warmed up
[Mon:20:25:01] rofl
[Mon:20:25:06] it loosens the hair folicles
[Mon:20:25:08] mach 3's even have those bands of shit above the blades for lube
[Mon:20:25:26] yeah, but mach 3's have that fuct design, no good for nut-shaving
[Mon:20:25:30] fuck...once again if I'd know this
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[Mon:20:25:37] damnit!
[Mon:20:25:44] I have a straight razor...
[Mon:20:25:49] hrm...
[Mon:20:25:52] venuses are good
[Mon:20:26:05] those are girly razors
[Mon:20:26:08] I'm not putting a girl razor on my manly parts
[Mon:20:26:08] man, if you put a straight razr anywhere near your nuts your a far braver man than i
[Mon:20:26:17] Straight Razors actually give a closer and better shave
[Mon:20:26:29] yeah, and one little slip...
[Mon:20:26:31] well, it's a straight razor with theis guard on it
[Mon:20:26:36] that may be.. but that is a sensitive area
[Mon:20:26:37] bye bye bag
[Mon:20:26:43] hey, homemade vesectimy
[Mon:20:27:13] bah...after this accident I don't want to scar my sac
[Mon:20:27:21] watch me get ingrown hairs though
[Mon:20:27:31] ouch
[Mon:20:27:40] how do I get rid of those
[Mon:20:27:56] no idea
[Mon:20:27:59] cause no one wants to get close to something with red bumps all over it
[Mon:20:28:17] I really hope I don't get ingrown hairs...
[Mon:20:28:31] damn you mach 3
[Mon:20:28:34] haha
[Mon:20:28:41] i had an ingorwn hair on my knee! it was so annoying
[Mon:20:28:47] Impy have I ever told you that you are a moron
[Mon:20:28:52] i've never experienced ingrown hairs
[Mon:20:28:55] yes, yes you have
[Mon:20:29:02] and it itched!
[Mon:20:29:07] well realize it... please
[Mon:20:29:10] one girl told you me wait for it to grow out and pluck it...
[Mon:20:29:39] I shaved my ass too...I wasn't going to put that out there...but I mean...I'm so far in my hole now
[Mon:20:29:49] haha
[Mon:20:29:53] ok, i'm out of this convo now
[Mon:20:29:58] lmfao
[Mon:20:30:00] * sum looks at something else
[Mon:20:30:04] umm.. like... your ass.. or your ass crack??
[Mon:20:30:07] * oyster looks at sum
[Mon:20:30:08] both
[Mon:20:30:12] ahhhh!
[Mon:20:30:14] Impy, don't feel bad. I have shaved my crotch and naired it
[Mon:20:30:15] good choise sum
[Mon:20:30:16] * sum looks back at oyster
[Mon:20:30:16] are you insane?
[Mon:20:30:20] choice
[Mon:20:30:31] hey, who likes a hairy crack
[Mon:20:30:32] honestly
[Mon:20:30:37] How can you shave your ass?
[Mon:20:30:43] * oyster prods at sum with a pointy stick
[Mon:20:30:43] and I enjoy my mooning ablities
[Mon:20:30:47] who would check your ass crack to see if it's hairy?
[Mon:20:30:48] Its like impossible to see, I don't know how ppl can shave back either
[Mon:20:30:50] abilities
"Remember how much fun you had shooting spitwads at the teacher in seventh grade? Imagine applying that kind of attitude to actually fucking with Mitsubishi!"
- Jello Biafra